ONE LINERS...

-Sex is like air, it's not important unless you aren't getting any.

-Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

-No guts, no glory, no brain, same story.

-Cocaine is God's way of telling you that you make too much money.

-If you don't die from it -- it is healthy.

-If everything is going well, you don't know what the hell is Going on.

-It is better to be looked over than overlooked.

-It is not what a teenager knows that bothers his parents, it is how he found out.

-There are two kinds of pedestrians -- the quick and the dead.

-Life is sexually transmitted.

-Falling in love is awfully simple. Falling out of love is simply awful.

-No job is so simple that it can't be done wrong.

-You can only be young once, but you can be immature forever.

-Only adults have difficulty with childproof bottles.

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