YOU KNOW YOU ARE FROM YERMO IF:
YOU EVER USED LARD IN BED.
YOU OWN MORE THAN THREE SHIRTS WITH THE SLEEVES CUT OFF.
YOU HAVE EVER SPRAY PAINTED YOUR GIRL FRIEND'S NAME ON AN
OVERPASS.
YOU CONSIDER A SIX-PACK OF BEER AND A BUG ZAPPER QUALITY
ENTERTAINMENT.
YOUR LIFETIME GOAL IS TO OWN A FIREWORKS STAND.
SOMEONE ASKS TO SEE YOUR I.D. AND YOU SHOW THEM YOUR BELT BUCKLE.
YOUR JUNIOR-SENIOR PROM HAD A DAY CARE.
YOUR MOTHER DOES NOT REMOVE THE MARLBORO LIGHT FROM HER LIPS
BEFORE TELLING THE
STATE PATROLMAN TO KISS HER REAR END.
THE PRIMARY COLOR OF YOUR CAR IS BONDO.
THE DIRECTIONS TO YOUR HOUSE INCLUDE "TURN OFF THE PAVED
ROAD".
YOUR DOG AND YOUR WALLET ARE BOTH ON A CHAIN.
YOUR KIDS ARE GOING HUNGARY BECAUSE YOU JUST HAD TO HAVE THE
YOSEMITE SAM "BACK OFF" MUD FLAPS.
YOU OWE THE TAXIDERMIST MORE THAN YOUR ANNUAL INCOME.
YOU EVER LOST A TOOTH OPENING A BEER BOTTLE.
JACK DANIELS MAKES YOUR LIST OF MOST ADMIRED PEOPLE.
YOUR WIFE'S HAIRDO HAS EVER BEEN RUINED BY A CEILING FAN.
YOU SEE NO NEED TO STOP AT A REST STOP BECAUSE YOU HAVE AN EMPTY
MILK JUG IN YOUR CAR.
YOU HAVE A RAG FOR A GAS CAP.
THE DOG CAN'T WATCH YOU EAT WITHOUT GAGGING.
YOU HAVE A HEFTY BAG ON THE PASSENGERS SIDE WINDOW OF YOUR CAR.
YOU HAVE BARBECUED SPAM ON THE GRILL.
YOU'VE EVER HAD TO SCRATCH YOUR SISTER'S NAME OUT OF THE MESSAGE
"FOR A GOOD TIME CALL____________________."
YOUR BROTHER-IN-LAW IS ALSO YOUR UNCLE.
REDMAN CHEWING TOBACCO SENDS YOU A CHRISTMAS CARD.
YOU BOUGHT A VCR BECAUSE WRESTLING COMES ON WHEN YOU ARE AT WORK.
YOUR DAD WALKS YOU TO SCHOOL BECAUSE YOU ARE IN THE SAME GRADE.
YOU VIEW THE UPCOMING FAMILY REUNION AS A CHANCE TO MEET GIRLS.
YOUR WIFE HAS A BEER BELLY AND YOU FIND IT ATTRACTIVE.
YOU PROMINENTLY DISPLAY A GIFT YOU BOUGHT AT GRACELAND.
YOUR HOUSE DOESN'T HAVE CURTAINS BUT YOUR TRUCK DOES.
YOUR FRONT PORCH COLLAPSES AND KILLS MORE THAN THREE DOGS.
YOU HAVE EVER STARTED A PETITION TO HAVE THE NATIONAL ANTHEM
CHANGED TO "FREE BIRD".
YOU CALL THE BOSS "DUDE".
YOU THINK A VOLVO IS PART OF A WOMAN'S ANATOMY.
YOU CONSIDER YOUR LICENSE PLATE "PERSONALIZED" BECAUSE
YOUR FATHER MADE IT.
YOU HAVE EVER BEEN FIRED FROM A CONSTRUCTION JOB BECAUSE OF YOUR
APPEARANCE.
YOU NEED ONLY ONE MORE HOLE PUNCHED IN YOUR CARD BEFORE YOU GET A
"FREEBIE" AT THE HOUSE OF TATOOS.
YOUR FATHER ENCOURAGES YOU TO QUIT SCHOOL BECAUSE LARRY HAS AN
OPENING AT "JIFFY LUBE".
YOU GET AN ESTIMATE AT THE BARBER BEFORE HE CUTS YOUR HAIR.
AFTER MAKING LOVE, YOU ASK YOUR DATE TO ROLL DOWN THE WINDOW.
YOUR FAMILY TREE DON'T FORK.
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