THINGS THAT BOTHER ME:
When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake
and eat it too".
Fuck off. What good is a goddam cake you can't eat? What, should I eat someone else's cake
Instead?
When people say "It's always in the last place you look". Of course it is. Why
would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?
When people say, while watching a movie "Did you see that?" No dicknose, I paid
$7.50 to come to the theatre and stare at that thing over there. What did you come here
for?
The radio ad "Hi, I'm Jeff Healey from the Jeff Healey Band. Don't drink and drive. I
don't". Well, I hope you don't drive sober either Mr. Healey. You're blind for god's
sake!
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People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is buddy,
where the fuck is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is?
The Pillsbury doughboy is way too happy considering he has no genitals.
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When something is "new and improved", which is it? If it's new, then there
has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been
something wrong with it before.
People who are willing to get off their ass to search the room for the TV remote because
they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.
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