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Medical Problems
A cowboy and a woman meet in a bar. They talk,
exchange names, and finally agree to go to a motel that evening. The woman is
disrobing when she pauses and says, Before this goes much farther, I must tell you that I
have acute angina.
The cowboy responds, Well, gosh, ma'am, I have a
rather handsome pecker myself."
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A lawyer from New York is transferred to a small frontier town during
the
settlement of the West. After several weeks there he notices that the
town was populated solely by men. He asks one of the local cowboys,
So what do
you do when you get the urge for a woman?
The cowboy replies, See them thar sheep up on thet hill. We just go
git
us one.
That is disgusting and barbaric!Î replies the lawyer.
After about 3 months the lawyer could not stand it any longer. He
decides that if he was going to do a sheep, he would show these yokels
how to do
it right.
He picks out the prettiest sheep of the bunch, baths her, puts a pink
ribbon on her, serves her hay on a china plate, dresses her in fine
lingerie,
and then takes the sheep to bed.
After he finishes he decides to take his new found lover out for a
drink.
He wanders into the local saloon with the sheep under his arm. The
piano
falls silent, the cowboys drop their drinks and stare in shocked
disbelief.
The lawyer exclaims, You bunch of hypocrites. You look at me as if
I'm
some sort of freak for doing what you've been doing all along. I'm
just doing
it with more class!
That ain't the problem, replies one cowboy, That's the sheriff's gal
you're with.
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At the Lumberyard...
Some men in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. One of the men
walked in the office and said, "We need some four-by-twos."
The clerk said, "You mean two-by-fours, don't you?"
The man said, "I'll go check," and went back to the truck. He
returned in a minute and said, "Yeah, I meant two-by-fours."
"Alright. How long do you need them?"
The customer paused for a minute and said, "I'd better go check."
After awhile, the customer returned to the office and said, "A long
time. We're gonna build a house."
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