WISDOM COMES IN MANY FORMS

- A closed mouth gathers no feet.
- A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
- A penny saved is ridiculous.
- A penny saved is just another darn thing for the cat to knock off of the dresser.
- All that glitters has a high refractive index.
- Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
- Anarchy is better than no government at all.
- Any small object when dropped will hide under a larger object.
- Don't force it, get a larger hammer.
- Entropy isn't what it used to be.
- Fairy tales: horror stories for children to get them use to reality.
- God did not create the world in 7 days. He pulled an all-nighter on the 6th.
- Going the speed of light is bad for your age.
- Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
- Herblock's Law: if it's good, they will stop making it.
- History does not repeat itself, historians merely repeat each other.
- It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education.
- It works better if you plug it in.
- It's not hard to meet expenses, they're everywhere.
- Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.
- Mediocrity thrives on standardization.
- Reality is the only obstacle to happiness.
- The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
- The 2 most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.
- Back Up My Hard Drive? How do I Put it in Reverse?
- I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
- Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
- I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
- She's always late. Her ancestors arrived on the Juneflower.
- I wonder how much deeper would the ocean be without sponges.
- Honk if you love peace and quiet.
- Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool.
- A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
- Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
- On the other hand, you have different fingers.

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