Page yourself over the intercom (don't disguise your voice).

Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Always wear them one day
after your boss does (this is especially effective if your boss is a different gender than you are).

Make up nicknames for all your coworkers and refer to them only by these names. "That's a good
point, Sparky." "No I'm sorry I'm going to have to disagree with you there, Chachi."

Send E-mail to the rest of the company telling them what you're doing. For example, "If anyone
needs me, I'll be in the bathroom."

"Hi-lite" your shoes. Tell people that you haven't lost your shoes since you did this.

While sitting at your desk, soak your fingers in "Palmolive."

Put up mosquito netting around your cubicle.

Put a chair facing a printer, sit there all day and tell people you're waiting for your document.

Arrive at a meeting late, say you're sorry, but you didn't have time for lunch, and you're going to
be nibbling during the meeting. During the meeting eat 5 entire raw potatoes.

Insist that your E-mail address be: zena_goddess_of_fire@companyname.com

Every time someone asks you to do something, ask them if they want fries with that.

Send E-mail to yourself engaging yourself in an intelligent debate about the direction of one of
your company's products. Forward the mail to a co-worker and ask her to settle the disagreement.

Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair dancing.

Put your garbage can on your desk. Label it "IN."

Determine how many cups of coffee is "too many."

Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.

Decorate your office with pictures of Cindy Brady and Danny Partridge. Try to pass them off as
your children.

For a relaxing break, get away from it all with a mask and snorkel in the fish tank. If no one
notices, take out your snorkel and see how many you can catch in your mouth.

Send E-mail messages saying free pizza, free donuts etc., in the lunchroom, when people
complain that there was none, just lean back, pat your stomach, and say, "Oh you've got to be
faster than that."

Put decaf in the coffeemaker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine
addictions, switch to espresso.

BONUS - 22 Ways to Be Annoying
1. Specify that your drive through order is "to go".
2. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with a pen while talking to others.
3. Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one
will "swipe your grub".
4. Name your dog "dog".
5. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener that it was a "real hoot".
6. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing odd silences with the
impression that you'll be saying more at any moment.
7. Finish all sentences with the words "in accordance with prophecy".
8. Signal a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.
9. Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train next Thanksgiving.
10. Dress only in clothes colored hunter's orange.
11. Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador".
12. When Christmas caroling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman Smells" until pysically restrained.
13. Pretend your computer mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it.
14. Try playing the "William Tell Overture" by tapping the bottom of your chin. When nearly
done announce "no wait, I messed it up", and repeat.
15. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.
16. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a southern drawl.
17. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers' brains, such as "Feliz
Navidad", the Archies' "Sugar" or the Mr. Rogers theme song.
18. Change your name to "John Aaaasmith" for the glory of being first in the phone book. Claim
that it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a".
19. Sing along at the opera.
20. Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend".
21. Construct elaborate crop circles on your front lawn.
22. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off
"in case the big one comes".