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Short Jokes
Rev. Warren J. Keating, Pastor of the First Presbyterian
Church of Yuma, AZ,
says that the best prayer he ever heard was: "Lord, please make me the kind of
person my dog thinks I am."
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A Woman went to the Post Office to buy stamps for her Christmas cards."What
Denomination?" Asked the clerk. "Oh, good heavens! Have we come to
this?" said the woman. "Well give me 50 Baptist and 50 Catholic ones."
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On a very cold, snowy Sunday in February, only the pastor and one farmer arrived at the
village church. The pastor said, "Well, I guess we won't have a service
today." The farmer replied: "Heck, if even only one cow shows up at
feeding time, I feed it."
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During a children's sermon, Rev. Larry Eisenberg asked the children what "Amen"
means. A little boy raised his hand and said: "It means
'Tha-tha-tha-that's all folks!' "
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A student was asked to list the 10 Commandments in any order. His answer?
"3, 6, 1, 8, 4, 5, 9, 2, 10, 7".
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I was at the beach with my children when my four-year-old son ran up to me, grabbed
my hand, and led me to the shore, where a sea gull lay dead in the sand.
"Mommy, what happened to him?" my little son asked. "He died
and went to Heaven," I replied. My son thought a moment and then said,
"And God threw him back down?"
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Bill Keane, creator of the Family Circus cartoon strip tells of a time when he was
penciling one of his cartoons and his son Jeffy said, "Daddy, how do you know what to
draw?" I said, "God tells me." Jeffy said, "Then why do you keep
erasing parts of it?"
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