Dogs don't cry.
Dogs love it when your friends come over.
Dogs think you sing great.
A dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink.
Dogs don't expect you to call when you are running late.
The later you are, the more excited dogs are to see you.
Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.
Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
Dogs are excited by rough play.
Dogs don't mind if you give their offspring away.
Dogs understand that farts are funny.
Dogs love red meat.
Dogs can appreciate excessive body hair.
Anyone can get a good-looking dog.
Dogs like it when you leave lots of things on the floor.
A dog's disposition stays the same all month long.
Dogs never need to examine the relationship.
Dogs love long car trips.
Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.
When a dog gets old and starts to snap at you incessantly, you can shoot it.
Dogs like beer.
It's legal to keep a dog chained up at your house.
Dogs don't want to know about every other dog you ever had.
Dogs like to do their snooping outside as opposed to in your wallet, desk, and the back of your sock drawer.
Dogs don't let magazine articles guide their lives.
Dogs never want foot-rubs.
Dogs enjoy heavy petting in public.
Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.
Dogs can't talk.
Dogs seldom outlive you.
Dogs would rather have you buy them a hamburger dinner than a lobster dinner.
Dogs are ready to go 24 hours a day.