>
> << Man's Best Friend
>
> A dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink.
> Dogs don't expect you to call when you are running late.
> The later you are, the more excited dogs are to see you.
> Dogs will forgive you for playing with other dogs.
> Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.
> Dogs are excited by rough play.
> Dogs don't mind if you give their offspring away.
> Dogs love red meat.
> Dogs can appreciate excessive body hair.
> Anyone can get a good-looking dog.
> If a dog is gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it.
> Dogs don't shop.
> Dogs like it when you leave lots of things on the floor.
> A dog's disposition stays the same all month long.
> Dogs never need to examine the relationship.
> A dog's parents never visit.
> Dogs love long car trips.
> Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.
> Dogs understand that all animals smaller than dogs were made to be hunted.
> When a dog gets old and starts to snap at you incessantly, you can shoot
> it.
> Dogs like beer.
> Dogs don't hate their bodies.
> No dog ever bought a Kenny G or Hootie & the Blowfish album.
> Dogs never criticize.
> Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.
> Dogs never expect gifts.
> It's legal to keep a dog chained up at your house.
> Dogs don't worry about germs.
> Dogs don't want to know about every other dog you ever had.
> Dogs like to do their snooping outside as opposed to in your wallet, desk,
> and the back of your sock drawer.
> Dogs don't let magazine articles guide their lives.
> Dogs would rather have you buy them a hamburger dinner than a lobster one.
> You never have to wait for a dog. They're ready to go 24 hours a day.
> Dogs have no use for flowers, cards, or jewelry.
> Dogs don't borrow your shirts.
> Dogs never want foot-rubs.
> Dogs enjoy heavy petting in public.
> Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.
> Dogs can't talk.
> Dogs aren't catty.
> Dogs seldom outlive you

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